When Families Start Saying Children Cost Too Much, The Country Should Pay Attention
- On Key Strategies
- Nov 18, 2025
- 4 min read
Updated: Jan 13
The newest American Family Survey, conducted by the Wheatley Institute and the Center for the Study of Elections and Democracy, was released last week and the results are stunning.
Seven in ten Americans now say raising children is too expensive. That is a thirteen point jump in a single year.
In research, that kind of movement is almost unheard of. In practical terms, it tells us families are not easing into concern. They are hitting a wall.
This shift is not subtle. Parents are pulling back on their plans because the financial strain has reached a breaking point. For the first time in the survey’s eleven year history, money was the number one reason Americans said they limited the size of their family. That should get the attention of anyone who cares about the strength of our communities and our economy.
I watch surveys like this closely because they reveal what families are actually living, not what we assume they are living. And this one could not be clearer. Across incomes, political preferences, and regions, families are reaching the same conclusion.
Raising young children has become too hard and too costly. Families have to be adjusting their lives right now, long before policymakers decide how to respond.
We hear a lot about an affordability crisis in politics. But this survey demonstrates the reality in a way that breaks through the noise. Families are not waiting for elected leaders to fix it. They are reshaping their futures today. When most Americans believe they cannot afford children, that is more than a trend line. It is a signal that something in our system is out of balance.
And here is the part that creates real urgency. We already know what helps. Paid family leave. Refundable child tax credits for young children. Affordable and high quality child care. None of these ideas are new or experimental. None belong to one side of the aisle. Republicans and Democrats have advanced versions of all three because they align with what families say they need. They support work. They reduce pressure on parents. They strengthen the long term health of the economy.
The problem is not a lack of solutions. The problem is the delay between what families need and what policymakers choose to prioritize.
Families do not have the luxury of that delay. When people decide they cannot afford to have a child, that decision rarely reverses. And the effects extend far beyond one household. You see it in workforce shortages, declining school enrollment, and slower economic growth. States like Ohio feel it almost immediately. Employers see it in open positions they cannot fill. Communities see it in younger workers who do not stay.
Parents today face three major cost drivers.
Child care costs now compete with a mortgage payment in many communities.
The lack of paid family leave forces parents back to work before they are physically or financially ready.
And the cost of raising young children continues to rise faster than wages.
These pressures stack on top of each other. Once they do, families lose the ability to shape their own path.
Paid family leave is one clear way to ease this pressure. It gives parents time to recover from birth and bond with their child without risking their jobs or falling into financial instability. States that offer paid leave see stronger workforce participation and healthier outcomes for infants. This is not about ideology. It is about aligning policy with what families actually need.
Refundable child tax credits have earned strong support at the federal level for nearly a decade from leaders across the political spectrum. Presidents and members of Congress from both parties have backed versions of the credit because they recognize that raising young children comes with real and rising costs. What is new is that these debates are now moving into state policy conversations. In Ohio, Governor DeWine introduced a refundable child tax credit targeted to families with infants, toddlers and preschoolers because early childhood is when expenses are highest. Other states are beginning to explore similar ideas as they hear the same message from families about affordability.
And then there is child care. When parents cannot find or afford care, everything else becomes harder. Employers feel it. Children feel it. Communities feel it.
Quality child care is not a luxury. It is a cornerstone of the modern workforce.
That is why more states are experimenting with public private partnerships and why businesses are becoming more vocal about the need for practical solutions.
What stands out in this survey is how straightforward families are about their needs. They are not asking for perfect systems. They are asking for stability. They want to work. They want to raise their children in safe and predictable environments. They want to build the families they imagined. But the math no longer supports those goals.
The affordability crisis is not an abstract concept. It is a warning from families who are doing everything we ask of them and still finding themselves behind.
If we fail to respond, the consequences will be felt in every part of the economy and in every corner of community life.
The good news is that we are not starting from scratch. Paid leave, refundable credits, and affordable child care are proven strategies that help families thrive and economies grow. They are practical. They are aligned with the values we claim to hold. And they match what families are telling us directly.
When raising a child starts to feel like something only a few can manage, it is a sign that our priorities need attention. We can fix this. Not by asking families to stretch further, but by updating our policies to reflect the real cost of raising the next generation. Families are doing their part. It is time for us to do ours.
